LOST WITHOUT LOST: Logs one and two

Just five days ago, I vowed to avenge Sky’s cruel Lost heist. The plan was akin to a written form of Chinese water torture. Every Sunday, I would document what I – a non-Sky subscriber – am doing as Lost Season Three plays out on their lead channel, then force feed this potentially VERY dull information to them via email. Maybe, once they see the true pain their greed has caused, they will relent.

And so, dear reader, I deliver the first entry from my log of despair in a world of mere freeview television where Lost has no home...

#1: Begrudgingly watched Torchwood. Got bored seven minutes in. Realised I’d left my phone in the car. Popped out to retrieve it. It was windy. Got back inside and put on Match of the Day 2. Wigan v Villa. No score draw. According to the Radio Times, “Jack, Kate and Sawyer find out what it's like to be in captivity, while Sun, Jin and Sayid build a big fire.” Crikey sounds about as exciting as my Sunday night. Maybe I'm not missing much after all?

It’s a double bill this week, so …

#2: Match of the Day 2 has ended. Consider having a bath (it’s been a while and could add a bit of excitement to proceedings). But no, decide to postpone until morning. Time for bed. Meanwhile on the island, according to the Radio Times, “Sun and Jin's lives are endangered when Sayid tries to locate Jack and the other missing castaways. Henry makes Jack a tempting offer in exchange for his cooperation. Kate and Sawyer must adjust to harsh conditions”. What harsh conditions? Has a freak hail storm hit the island? Will Locke made a scalf out of large furry leaves? Anyone?